Well, this is it.It's all fucking over. Either I die by my hand, or theirs. I have absolutely nobody left that I haven't hurt enough to want me dead. Nobody fucking cares about some crazy bipolar cunt. She was right. I'm nothing but a selfish cunt. I don't care anymore. It's all fucking over.
And you.
YOU.
Thanks for being the best fucking friend ever.
When someone cries out for help, you TAKE THEIR FUCKING HAND. AND FUCKING HELP FOR ONCE. YOU NEVER HAVE, YOU NEVER WILL. Quit pretending to not hear me. You've always been bad at pretending.
Well, this is it. Either I fall asleep even after bashing my head in a few times, and wake up a happy motherfucker, or... eh. I dunno. Maybe Dad'll send me off to that asylum he keeps threatening me with. Maybe Mom will kill off this piece of garbage like she keeps saying. Maybe I'll finally pull the fucking trigger like I've been saying for years. Maybe I'll stop being so fucking selfish, but fuck, I doubt that. Everyone left me for that, I bet. It's okay, I'm probably going to leave, too. Just dunno how yet.
Fuck this and fuck you all.
Love
Devious Comments
But in your journal yesterday, you were all happy. Just want to know why the sudden change?
You can talk to me about anything if you want, k?
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FUCK SALT.
Avatar made by :iconAerieyena:
All the people here that actually truly do care about you and your well being?
Alright then. Thanks, I suppose. I was going to try to help, but it appears you don't want it...
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...with a potato.
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by ~cremecake * I thank the cake for the free avatar!!*
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Rest in Peace James Cheng :: 1.26.2008.
Avatar made by ~Sergeant-McFluffers~ <3 Thanks!
In other words: I'm horrible at comforting, but I really but care and you haven't pissed me off any. It's not that you're different online and offline,. it's that you don't show your hurt face until you've dealt with it too much and need to explode. We're alike in that, although most of my bitching winds up over at LJ 'cause no one there notices.
Anyway~ You have yet to convince me that you're anything but an awesome person even with all the problems you've got, so no dying until at least after the Hetalia get together. Preferrably not after, either.
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But I must be my own master,
Or if a miniature disaster hits me,
It could be the death of me.
~KT Tunstall~Miniature Disasters~
Xion is my favorite character. Suck it up.
~black-x-blindfold ~SerahClub
But how many of these journals have you made, Rae? About how something horrible has happened and you just want to off yourself one way or another?
I'm not doubting your life is bad, I know it is. But it's not that people are not wanting to help...some of us are exasperated. We love you and don't want anything bad to happen to you, but when you're giving these extreme ultimatums...what are we to do?
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...with a potato.
Everyone else has.
I write what I honestly feel in these journals. If you can't deal with what I say, then go. I don't want it, but hey, whatever the fuck makes everyone else happy.
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Rest in Peace James Cheng :: 1.26.2008.
Avatar made by ~Sergeant-McFluffers~ <3 Thanks!
Sorry, but I find that hard to believe.
If "everyone gave up" and you REALLY don't care as you so claim, you wouldn't even bother writing them. It still shows there's a part of you that really does not want to die and realizes someone out there can help.
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...with a potato.
Maybe someone CAN help. But I haven't seen one actually do it during this whole crisis. Nobody gave a fuck when I was like this earlier. Nobody gave a fuck as they walked away, causing me to get worse.
Please stop pretending to care. You're not looking so good at it.
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Rest in Peace James Cheng :: 1.26.2008.
Avatar made by ~Sergeant-McFluffers~ <3 Thanks!
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